The start of the school year
Returning to school after the summer holidays is a challenging time for many children. Not only do they have to get used to the early mornings and imposed structure of the school routine, they are also faced with many unknowns, including a new teacher, new classmates and classroom, and new expectations – both related to adjusting to the new teacher’s expectations and also the increase in expectations that come as a child rises through the years at school. And this is assuming they are returning to the same school!
As adults we have a tendency to underestimate how challenging these adjustments are for children. Imagine having to start a new job every year – new colleagues, new boss, new job description, new workplace culture, new physical environment…
Traditionally a lot has been made of children’s resilience, in the face of change, without appropriate recognition, in my opinion, of the factors that go into building this. The best way to develop resilience in children is to actively work on building their sense of security. Feeling secure provides a platform from which a child can launch themselves into the world and comes from a balance of predictability and achievable challenges, which create self-confidence.
Things you can do to build your child’s sense of security include –
Taking any fears about returning to school seriously. This doesn’t often require a lot of problem solving (something I think we Kiwis tend to rush into). Often a simple acknowledgement that we know it is tough for them is enough. Children need to feel they are not alone with their fears.
Get your children into a school focused sleep routine. (None of us operate well on limited sleep – something many of us have first-hand experience of in the heat of this summer!)
Make sure they have everything they need to return to school, ahead of time, if possible.
If you can, find out which teacher, classroom and classmates your child will have this year. If it’s a new school for your child try to print off a map of the school to reduce worries about getting lost on the first day.
Make time after school to spend focused time with your child to give them the chance to ‘debrief’ if they want to, and to reconnect with you after a long day.
And remember… we all take a while to get used to change.
Returning to school after the summer holidays is a challenging time for many children. Not only do they have to get used to the early mornings and imposed structure of the school routine, they are also faced with many unknowns, including a new teacher, new classmates and classroom, and new expectations – both related to adjusting to the new teacher’s expectations and also the increase in expectations that come as a child rises through the years at school. And this is assuming they are returning to the same school!
As adults we have a tendency to underestimate how challenging these adjustments are for children. Imagine having to start a new job every year – new colleagues, new boss, new job description, new workplace culture, new physical environment…
Traditionally a lot has been made of children’s resilience, in the face of change, without appropriate recognition, in my opinion, of the factors that go into building this. The best way to develop resilience in children is to actively work on building their sense of security. Feeling secure provides a platform from which a child can launch themselves into the world and comes from a balance of predictability and achievable challenges, which create self-confidence.
Things you can do to build your child’s sense of security include –
Taking any fears about returning to school seriously. This doesn’t often require a lot of problem solving (something I think we Kiwis tend to rush into). Often a simple acknowledgement that we know it is tough for them is enough. Children need to feel they are not alone with their fears.
Get your children into a school focused sleep routine. (None of us operate well on limited sleep – something many of us have first-hand experience of in the heat of this summer!)
Make sure they have everything they need to return to school, ahead of time, if possible.
If you can, find out which teacher, classroom and classmates your child will have this year. If it’s a new school for your child try to print off a map of the school to reduce worries about getting lost on the first day.
Make time after school to spend focused time with your child to give them the chance to ‘debrief’ if they want to, and to reconnect with you after a long day.
And remember… we all take a while to get used to change.
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